Two and A Half Men

That phrase has stuck in my head – ‘our’ heads, if you count the “two and a half” of us – for the past few days.  “Two and A Half Men”.  Yeah, I know.  Show with Charlie Sheen.  But it kinda fits us as well – and we laugh, seeing ourselves in that apartment there: two and a half men.  Two men and a little boy (though our ‘little boy’ is a little bit younger than the one on TV.)

I’m the only host I know who has two other “hosts” – or ‘previous hosts’ (in a way.  Like a Marine: once a host, always a host.).  That is; I am the ‘host’ of this event (this ‘event’ being part of my – and ‘our’ – lifetime).  I am one of three, commonly referred to as M3 (probably because I don’t prefer to give my full name), though there are often other names I’ve been known to go by.  (“Marine” refers to one of my inside alters; he is an ‘alter’ to and/or of an alter as well.  I guess you could say we’re all interrelated.  Naturally 🙂

But technically speaking, I’ve got “three hosts” – two and a half men.  One is ‘me’, one is the ‘boy’, and then there’s the teenager (Matthew – you’ve probably ‘met’ him if you’ve followed this blog for long.)  Of the three Matt is the most difficult to me; though there’s also ‘Jeffery’ to contend with.  (He ‘smells’ suspiciously of the boy, but if he is, he’s from the heart of him.)

This is something we need to and should be ‘working on’ – our “lineage” and “heritage” and interconnections . . . how we all ‘fit’ together . . .

That’s one thing we picked up on while on our Adventure in Puerto Rico.  “Each” of us is good (or better) at a certain thing . . . and GAWD …. some of those things!

Mikie (the little boy, about 8 years old) – is the one who ‘took us walking’, meaning HE is the one who helped us survive by sucking up (and surviving) all the pain in our feet.  Literally ‘he’ is the one, the ‘core’ (or closest to) that helped us survive.  That, and his curiosity and ability to “see”.

Get this.

When we give the command “see” or “record” to him … sight literally seems to grow much SHARPER and we’re into noticing the littlest details of shit … looking at the trees, we see all them leaves; looking at the grass, every individual blade . . . even the ants crawling on them (if we can see them – there is a limit to physical sight you know!!!  The grass thing works best with the grass at my feet – if I can see it.  Damn.  Need some glasses!)  But colors – red ‘snaps’ (a bit much; we’re colorblind, meaning ‘red weak’, which is something about 10-15% of the male population suffers from).  But colors become brighter . . .

Recording is something else, and we have to ‘work’ on it to commit to long term memory …

“Hear” or “Hear it all” …. ditto the seeing thing, only listening.  And Matthew is a bit more involved in that one ….

But the thing that really gets me and touches my heart is how Mikie kept ‘hanging on’ trudging along those endless highways and back roads …. feet blistered and bleeding and ‘sucking up’ the pain …. really a mysterious and wonderful thing ….

And Matthew and the Soldier were watching out for them.

As far as “me” (M3 – somewhat – I’m “here” with Matthew; 3 of us can “look on” or “be on Top” at one time) – well, I was standing back ‘admiring’ them … while doing some analytics of my own (for example: the “determining the lay of the land by the clouds in the sky” kind of thing – the one that freaked our BIN out so much – where we looked at the sky and told him where the passes lay and the mountains lay all around us – concealed (you couldn’t look at them directly) – but we knew they were there by the way the clouds were behaving).  Nifty trick, BTW, if you know how to do this thing …. and apparently (and to our surprise! no less!!!  Very excited knowing this RIGHT NOW for unknown reasons) a skill we did not know we possessed.

Go figure.  WE can’t.  LOL’ing.


I’m curious, Readers.  What do YOU think about that skill?  We’re still wonderin’ how we figured THAT one out!

Anyway … gotta run.



About jeffssong

JW is an adult childhood abuse survivor with DID*. He grew up in a violent family devoid of love and affection. He is a military brat and veteran. He no longer struggles with that past. In 1976 JW began writing "The Boy". It took 34 years to complete. It is currently on Kindle ( ), or if you prefer hard copy, on Amazon ( JW resides somewhere in the deep South. He is disabled and living with family. Note: Please feel free to take what you need; all is free to all. With that in mind, keep it that way to others. Thank you. We have 3 Blogs - One for our younger days, 0-10 (The Little Shop of Horrors); one for our Teen Alter and his 'friends' (also alters) with a lot of poetry; and finally "my" own, the Song of Life (current events and things)
This entry was posted in Alters, child abuse survivor, DID, DID Advantages and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Go Ahead. You were thinking . . . ?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s