The Reason For EVERYTHING Everyone Does

The Reason For Everything –

People want, say or do anything.

There is only ONE reason anyone does something, thinks something.  Whether it be the child rapist-serial murderer raping and murdering a child; a childhood sweetheart showering you with kisses, the urge or need to buy whatever it is you are thinking about buying, owning, or controlling; the desire to have money – nor not, the want & desire for ANYTHING boils down to just ONE SINGLE MOTIVE:

You (or they) thought it would make them happy.

No matter how you slice and dice it – from personal sacrifice, down to giving your life for someone, murdering someone, raping someone, giving presents, getting gifts, making purchases, et cetra and on ad infinitum, IF you ask “WHY?” long enough you will get to this thing:

“I wanted to be happy and thought this would satisfy that need.”

Beyond basic survival, of course, meaning food, shelter, and livable environment, all people want is to be happy.  And they show it in all kinds of crazy ways.  MOST DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY ARE SEARCHING FOR.  But if you bore down through their motives, asking that question “why?” often enough, to and through everything, the answer is going to be: “I thought it would get me some happiness; make me happy in some way.”

And in over 90% of the instances, they were wrong, wrong, WRONG.  It might have bought them some happiness for an instant or awhile, but when it comes to “outside”* things, you are ALWAYS DOOMED TO FAIL.

IF perhaps your happiness lays in those human ideals of family and love . . . then what happens when they die?  Or YOU die?  Are you going to be happy then?  It might just be the thing that makes you miserable there at your end!  Thinking about all those loved ones you are going to leave behind, maybe leaving some of them devastated, alone.

So much for the happiness you thought you were buying then.  It is gone, and gone forever in that last case.  Same with kids – some grow up and leave you.  Some die.  Some never come back.  I’ve had all three, and more. (There are the unknown fates of some, but we choose it to be intentionally so.)

So outside things cannot buy you happiness.  Not family, nor money.  Indeed, it seems that those who have a lot of it spend a lot of their time worrying about it, down to every dime!  And that’s not buying ME happiness if I have to work all the time guarding every cent and making sure the right investments were made and no one is ripping me off.  Plus there’s the McMansions to take care of – or at least you might have to manage a manager who manages your “everything”, and even still there’s going to be a drain in the back of your mind . . . always worrying and always wondering if he (or you) are doing the right thing maintaining that bank account of yours.

It’s no wonder money causes so much misery.  Too much and you’ve got a lot to worry about; not enough and it threatens your physical survival, and it is very hard to get in the frame of mind suitable to withstand starving and poverty and just waiting to die.

For the most part, WE (and I mean ‘me’ & my alters) have it down.  We can be quite happy sitting in rags in the mud alongside some ditch waiting to fall in.  We kinda learned that thing along our way, but I don’t recommend it.  It’s not very good for you and hard on the human body.

So remember this: Even by you sitting there reading this – why are you doing it?  I would suggest you are doing it on your own search for happiness, some peace in your mind, and we ALL (even our now tamed Beast) wish you the best of luck in it.  But as you can see from the above you’re not going to find it outside yourself.  You must look within; change your attitudes and perceptions and accept that you are NOT going to be 100% perfect at it.  Neither am “I”.  We are lousy at it sometimes, building into rages & smoldering angers.  But we also try and defuse them most carefully, examining their aspects and OUR attitudes looking to make correction in some way that WE can perceive “this event” or “that happening” as something positive, or in some positive light, even if it means taking a lesson on HOW to do that at some death, murder, and suicide; or our own upcoming demise (hopefully still a long time away, but poor ol’ Body has been shot).  You gotta get good with it, et all, if you want to be happy, and REALLY happy all your life.  Change how you see a thing and you can change how you FEEL about it.  (Officially that’s called “cognitive therapy” for those who wish to pursue this.)

I highly recommend it.  You CAN be happy AND live a happier life without buying a book, getting a date, having a new car/house/home/lifemate (maybe).  You don’t have to do yoga; you don’t have to exercise, nor do you have to watch your diet.  You CAN be happy without anything but YOU if you try, even through storm and threat and friends dying. Even family sometimes. You can learn to do this.

So why do I want you to try????

Because it makes me happy to think I might be helping some other human beings in finding happier lives . . . because I want us all to be able to live together in happiness . . .

and why?

Because happy human beings are no threat.  And that affects my survival and the survival of everyone else on this planet.  Which is why all humans want other humans to be happy (or die in some cases).  It’s so they no longer threaten anyone’s survival.

Ultimately everything is tied to this “survival instinct” in us, and the animal.  But we’ll save that subject for later: how everything ties into the survival instinct; however, there are times human beings will, for perceived happiness, put an end to their, or others’ lives, whether through their own hands or dying themselves (personal sacrifice).

So be Happy.  It’s a learned skill, by the way.  Don’t think you are going to buy this.  Or that it’s going to happen overnight.  But you can do it – if you (and yours, if you are DID-MPD like us) try.




About jeffssong

JW is an adult childhood abuse survivor with DID*. He grew up in a violent family devoid of love and affection. He is a military brat and veteran. He no longer struggles with that past. In 1976 JW began writing "The Boy". It took 34 years to complete. It is currently on Kindle ( ), or if you prefer hard copy, on Amazon ( JW resides somewhere in the deep South. He is disabled and living with family. Note: Please feel free to take what you need; all is free to all. With that in mind, keep it that way to others. Thank you. We have 3 Blogs - One for our younger days, 0-10 (The Little Shop of Horrors); one for our Teen Alter and his 'friends' (also alters) with a lot of poetry; and finally "my" own, the Song of Life (current events and things)
This entry was posted in Education, Happiness, Life, mental health, Mental Health Professionals, Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Go Ahead. You were thinking . . . ?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s